Youth workers: supporting rangatahi with harmful or upsetting online content

Focus: Recognising feelings, seeking help, and building confidence

Conversation starters

• "If you saw something on TV, YouTube, or a game that made you feel worried or upset, what could you do?"
  (Ideas: turn it off, mute it, leave the room, cover your ears, talk to a trusted adult.)
• "Who could you talk to if something on a screen made you feel scared or confused?"
  (Ideas: parent, whānau member, teacher, older sibling, or a trusted youth worker.)
• "Sometimes we see things that make us feel funny inside, like worried or sad. What helps you feel better when that happens?"
  (Ideas: talking to someone, cuddling a pet, playing outside, doing a calming activity.)

Remind tamariki that if someone shows them something upsetting on a phone, tablet, or computer, they shouldn’t show their friends. Instead, talk to a trusted adult who can help.

If tamariki don’t respond or go quiet

“Sometimes we don’t have the right words yet; that’s okay. We can revisit this later when you’re ready.”

Focus: Making safe choices and knowing where to get help

Conversation starters

• "If you came across something in a video, game, or online that didn’t feel right, what could you do?"
  (Ideas: close the screen, leave the site, find a trusted adult.)
• "Who are the people you could talk to if something online upset you?"
  (Ideas: parent, whānau, mentor, youth worker, community leader, counsellor.)
• "Sometimes friends might show us things that make us feel uncomfortable. What could you say or do if that happens?"
  (Ideas: say 'no thanks', turn away, tell a trusted adult.)

If kōrero stalls

“Sometimes it’s hard to talk about things that feel funny inside or icky; that’s normal. What helps you when you feel unsure?”

Focus: Recognising harmful content, making safe choices, and seeking support

Conversation starters

• "What could you do if you saw something online that was scary, confusing, or upsetting?"
  (Ideas: leave the site, block the content, talk to an adult you trust, don’t share it with others.)
• "Sometimes things we see online can stick in our heads. What could help if that happens?"
  (Ideas: talk about it, do something calming, play a game, take a break from screens.)
• "If a friend showed you something you didn’t want to see, what could you do?"
  (Ideas: tell them you don’t want to watch it, walk away, talk to a trusted adult.)
• "Why do you think friends might share content that’s harmful or upsetting?"
  (Ideas: they didn’t know what else to do, they felt shocked, they wanted someone else to feel the same, or they made it a joke to feel less upset.)
• "Who are the adults you can go to if something online worries you?"
  (Ideas: parent, whānau, youth worker, mentor, community leader, counsellor, teacher.)

If tamariki are getting phones or social media access, explain why many platforms have a 13+ age restriction. Introduce the idea of algorithms and help them understand how to curate their feeds so they see content they want, rather than what the platform pushes.

If kōrero feels flat or defensive

“Lots of people see stuff online they wish they hadn’t; it doesn’t mean you’re in trouble. What would help make it easier to talk about?”

Focus: Critical thinking and seeking support

Conversation starters

• "What could you do if you saw something in a video game, or online that felt harmful or wrong?"
  (Ideas: leave the site, block the content, talk to a trusted adult or youth worker.)
• "Sometimes things we see online or in videos can stick with us. What might help if that happens?"
  (Ideas: talk with someone you trust, write or draw about it, take a break.)
• "If a friend showed you something that made you uncomfortable, what could you do?"
  (Ideas: close the screen, say you don’t want to see it, check in on your friend, help them find support.)
• "Why do you think friends might share harmful or upsetting content?"
  (Ideas: they’re confused, want someone else to understand how they feel, or don’t realise how harmful it is.)
• "Do you know what an algorithm is? And how to curate your feed?"
  (Ideas: explain how social media chooses what you see and discuss ways to control it.)

If rangatahi brush it off or joke

“It’s okay if it feels awkward; what do you think makes it hard for people to talk about what they see online?”

Focus: Growing independence, critical thinking, and accessing support

Conversation starters:

• "If you came across something harmful or upsetting online, what could you do?"
  (Ideas: block it, report it, leave the site, talk to a trusted adult like a youth worker, mentor or community leader.)
• "Sometimes videos, images, or posts online stick in our minds. How could you manage this?"
  (Ideas: talk to someone, take breaks, focus on positive activities, avoid dealing with it alone.)
• "If a friend shared something that made you uncomfortable, what would you do?"
  (Ideas: don’t forward it, talk to your friend, ask if they’re okay, report it, seek help.)
• "Can anyone explain how social media works?"
  (Ideas: discuss algorithms, misinformation, and practical strategies for curating feeds.)
• "What advice would you give a younger sibling or friend about being safe online?"
  (Ideas: think before you share, curate your content, and ask for help when needed.)

If kōrero goes quiet or someone jokes:

“Sounds like this might be one of those topics easier to laugh about than talk about. Why do you think its like that?”

Focus: Recognising harm, making informed decisions, and accessing support

Conversation starters:

• "If you came across something harmful or illegal online, what could you do?"
  (Ideas: leave the site, report it, talk to a trusted adult, use helplines like 1737 or Youthline.)
• "What kind of content do you think might be illegal?"
  (Ideas: child sexual abuse material, sexual violence, violent extremist content, animal cruelty.)
• "Have you ever seen something online that stuck with you? What could help?"
  (Ideas: talk to someone, take breaks, do calming activities, stay connected offline.)
• "If a friend shared something unsafe, how would you handle it?"
  (Ideas: don’t forward it, report it, check in on your friend, connect them to support, talk to a trusted adult.)

Focus: Critical thinking, legal awareness, peer support, and emotional wellbeing
(Whakamārama, Manaakitanga, Whakamana)

Conversation starters:

• "What responsibility do we have if we see harmful or illegal content?"
  (Ideas: don’t share it, report it, support each other, and seek professional help.)
• "Why is some content classified as illegal or objectionable?"
  (Ideas: discuss the harm it causes, exploitation, and impacts on individuals and communities.)
• "How do you manage it when something online affects you emotionally?"
  (Ideas: talk to someone you trust, curate your feeds, take breaks, reach out for support.)
• "If a friend came to you after seeing something harmful, how could you support them?"
  (Ideas: listen, don’t judge, help them connect to adults or helplines, remind them it’s not their fault.)
• "What advice would you give younger rangatahi about navigating online spaces?"
  (Ideas: be critical of what you see, block/report unsafe content, and remember; you don’t have to deal with harmful stuff alone.)

If kōrero gets sidetracked or heavy:

“That’s an interesting point. I wonder how that connects to what we see online and how it makes us feel. Let’s think about what support or action might help.”