Can my 5-year-old watch the Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour film?

Disney+ self-rated the three-and-a-half-hour film M with a warning note for offensive language.

My first thought was given the M rating, the length of the film and the offensive language warning, that this movie might not work for a five-year-old who can’t sit still and who picks up on EVERYTHING.

Anyone can watch a film with an M label, but they are more suitable for a mature audience – and this is the kind of content I wouldn’t usually consider showing my daughter. However, thinking about her boundaries, and her likes and dislikes when it comes to screen time, I decided to check whether Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour could be the exception.

I started by doing a bit of internet sleuthing and did a fast forward through the film to get a sense of what we were in for.

Offensive language

My daughter is aware that there are bad words, and we often talk about the power some words can hold. The rule is its important to understand what a word means before we use it and that some words might not hurt our own feelings, but they could hurt other peoples. Other than the time she dropped an accidental f-bomb instead of saying truck when she was two, she hasn’t said anything offensive yet.

So, considering the offensive language warning for Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour, I wanted to know how frequently it happened, what the was the context and the tone.

Frequency

If Taylor Swift was standing up there swearing her face off while talking to the audience, it would have been a strong no from me. My daughter sees Taylor Swift as a role-model I didn’t want to encourage or normalise swearing. What I found throughout the film was pretty in-frequent.

Context

Within the song lyrics and audience chants the film does include the words “f*ck”, “sh*t” and “b*tch”. When we listen to her music at home and car, we often have the censored versions, or we do the classic *turn down volume to quickly ask a question*. There have been times where something has slipped through (we’re human, right?). In these instances, either it’s an opportunity to talk about ‘bad’ words and their power, or honestly, she beats me to it, shaking her head at Taylor’s choice and yells “come on Taylor”.

Based on the infrequency I decided that I could adopt this approach while watching the film. I know the lyrics well enough and TikTok has educated me enough to know what the chants are that go with each song.

Tone

Building on from context, I am reminded of a time when we were walking down the street and a person was yelling and swearing. They were obviously having a mental health struggle. My daughter found this quite alarming and confusing. We talked about it and she brought it up again later. I could tell that it was a moment that would sit with her for a while. Comparing this with the Taylor Swift: Eras Tour and the language used in the film, these are two extremely different situations. The tone of the offensive language used in the film is not frightening, aggressive or upsetting. It’s infrequently woven into songs and chants where Taylor and the audience are smiling, moved and happy. As a parent it is easier for me to use this example of offensive language to have more in depth conversation about the power of words.

Scary scenes

It’s a stage show, what could possibly be scary? Thinking about my daughters’ boundaries, something that I always look out for is anything that might scare her. Monsters, frights, and dark scenes don’t sit right with her, and we tend to avoid that type of content (I like sleeping at night and those things give her nightmares).

Specifically thinking about the album Reputation I had an inkling that there could be something that might scare her and sure enough during the transition to the album huge black snakes enveloped the stage. This might not be scary for other children her age, but I knew this could be a bit freaky for her.

Because this scene was a one off, I decided to talk to her about it first. I described what happens and explained how even though it isn’t real it could be a bit scary. I then gave her a series of options that included, not watching the film, skipping that scene, watching with the sound off or watching it as it is. I made sure she knew she had an out, and that I would immediately turn it off if she found it too scary. Even with screentime it is important to empower children with choices that have safety nets around them when they are outside their comfort zones.

Length

Like most tamariki my daughter cannot sit still. I thought that this would be the biggest challenge we would have to overcome while watching something that was over three and a half hours long. And she didn’t sit still. Instead, she danced, sung along, and wanted to change her outfit to something sparkly and glorious. We broke it up into sections, watching some of it as our Saturday movie night, and watched more the next day. I thought she might have found it a bit boring considering what she normally watches but she is a true Swiftie and loved every second of it.

Would I let her watch other live concerts or M rated content? Probably not at the moment. After some extensive research and preparation, I decided that this would be a film that we lax some of our whānau rules for, but it doesn’t change the way that we normally approach screentime. And this exception was very much based on her boundaries and interests.

Before pressing play it’s important to check in with who you are watching with – especially tamariki. Finding out what the rating and content warning is provides baseline advice on what to expect and indicates what the strongest content will be. It also makes it so much easier to compare this information with personal preferences, and whether the film, series or video game is a good option.

And if you are wondering, yes, I did listen to Taylor Swift while writing this blog.

Mātaki tahi – Watch together

Kōrero tahi – Talk together

Further reading:

• What can my five-year-old watch for some quiet time? (blog)
• Why are ratings and content warnings important for me and my whānau? (blog)
• The ‘Bluey’ parenting hack (how to start those tricky conversations when your kids are young) (blog)
• Why parental controls are your video on-demand life hack (blog)
• PG, Violence and Avatar: The Last Airbender (blog)
• Parenting Mini Gamers (blog)